Lilliana has changed so much in the past 22 months. She is becoming her own person and learning so many new things. She is talking more and more and it just amazes me all the things that she has learned. Today we were just going over body parts and she has learned almost all the parts of her head and we are starting on the rest of her body. She is learning about more and more animals and learning to push my limits in the behavior area, but most days she is better then others. She does have quite a short temper and will try to bite me when she is really pissed, but we are working on that.
However, being home with her all day I usually give nightly duties to her Daddy to take care of.
Lilliana...brand spanking new..
Tonight, The Voice is on and I wanted to watch it and actually hear how the people sounded. So, I kept telling her to go and give her daddy a hug or kiss. She would oblige me and run across the couch and fling her body on him and hug or kiss him, but then she would come right back and sit on my lap and stare at me. Now, I wasn't getting mad, but I though that it would be nice for her to spend some time with her daddy. I mean she's with me all day...I can't be that exciting can I? So I gave up trying to watch t.v. and read a book with her, tossed her around, tickled her, hugged and loved on her.
When Hubbs got up to get her in her jammies she got changed and then sat in my lap and I hugged her and I realized that she's not going to be small forever. She has grown so fast in the last 22 months. She just laid there and laughed. I would kiss her and she would just laugh. It made me so sad how fast she has gotten and happy that she is a loving girl. She is everything that I never expected and everything that I wanted out of my first baby. She gives me a hard time and teaches me how to be a better parent each and every day. When she was laying in my arms and I could feel her sweet breath on my face and hear her giggle the world stopped for a minute. I didn't want to hand her off to her daddy because the thought occurred to me that she wouldn't always want to be cuddled close and loved on. There will be times in her life when she dislikes (she will think she hates) me. At times she will think that she is too old for hugs and kisses. I just held her tight and cried. Tears started falling down my face and I wanted to just bottle up the love that I felt between us all at that moment. With her daddy standing next to us, waiting to carry her off to dreamland and her laying in my lap feeling so completely loved.
I wish that everyone could feel that...the love between a parent and a child. It's an amazing bond that steals your breath when you least expect it. It's hearing the cry of "Momma" and knowing that you are truly needed, the center of your child's universe. It's a smile when they wake up and the pure innocence in their hearts. They are so untouched and just beautiful!!! I often make fun of Hubbs for all the videos he takes. We watch them all the time and just cry at how both of our girls have changed so much. I feel that the Lord put us on this Earth to be parents. There is no greater gift then a child.....I will remember the feeling of love tonight when I am stressed about bills, cleaning, or up to my elbow in dirty diapers. I will remember feeling of being the center of her universe and all the love that is within our little family.